Behind the scene

Behind the scene

It is a state of mind. Everything starts with a mindset

Even when you take the photo, you’re already in the state of mind.

If you’re too happy, you can not make black creations, as you can not generate any joy when you’re depressed.

My most creative feelings are anger and hatred. So yes, you’re gonna tell me it’s not very pretty stuff. But this is where I tell you that I don’t give a shit, I’m the artist here.

Fallen Angel

I do not hate everything and everyone. I am selective in hatred and contempt. Hate and anger are my own so no need to go too deep in there.

For creation itself, you have to know that over 200 photos, at least 150 going to the dump because none inspires me. My best works come usually after shit weeks! The creative has never had an easy life and unfortunately I do not break the rule. My life is happy, but is so only because we fought, my wife and me to overcome obstacles before whom many would have turned around: parasites, motherfuckers, varied assholes, jealousy, deaths, pettiness, sacrifices, I can go on all night. As always, many have dropped us, few have always supported us against all odds, they will recognize themselves there.

Returning to the fundamental …

IDGAF-Photography - 45

Start shooting … Why take pictures of the beach, static, boring, repetitive, uninteresting? Been there, done that, not a single ounce of pleasure out.

Without being religious, I believe we all have a mission. To me, the photographer’s will is throwing to your face that reality you do not want to see. Sorry, life hurts, you have to deal with that. Those who give me both nausea and diarrhea are those who live in golden bubbles and have the indecency to complain, again, forever, and ever.

So start shooting, walking in neighborhoods where no one dares to go, because it’s ugly. Talking with people, and getting confirmation that any bum Panama has more value than all these useless complainers from their so called “first world country”. Yikes.

Small shop around

Take their pictures, even if they disagree (then, without letting them know), knowing that most of them have asked, because they deserve to leave a trace too. Spend 30 minutes in a Fonda (typical restaurant where you will find yourself being the only foreigner (the others being too picky to dare put a foot or a butt in there…) and speak in broken Spanish to people who have a lifetime to tell. Getting impaired, because you can’t refuse a Cervez offered with full heart!

Going in back streets where women prostitute, sometimes by choice. Get their price from a toothless taxi driver! And laugh, laugh, and laugh again because they are still happy, no matter what.

Back home, by bus, with Panamanian workers despite harassing days, keep smiling and enjoying every single minute on planet earth. Learn these lessons young Padawan, they have everything to teach you. I never felt in danger in the midst of these people, I salute them, I respect them, I love them.

Night sleep. Next to my wife!

Next day, another state of mind. The photographer becomes a creator.

Atmosphere. Little or no light, 2 coffees, music. Example of my sounded inspiration. Music is like the spirit. It must exudes the emotion depending on what you want to convey. You can not create sadness with the Beach Boys in your playlist.

Some pictures take me two hours to transform; other two months. It’s all about timing. Some take me only a few minutes to know what I’ll turn them into. From a technical standpoint, some creations need 20 layers to produce emotion. A picture is never finished. Everything can be improved, changed. Even my best work always leave me a frustrating feeling of incompleteness.

One last thing, you do not need a thousand dollar camera to make beautiful photos and convey your message. Your emotion, buddy, lays in your eyes and in your heart. Never let a rich guy make you believe you are not as good as him. Believe me, this guy is worthless himself. I have met some, a lot of them, too many of them in fact. I founded a club of photographers that I ended leaving since other members wanted to follow pre-established rules. In photographic creation, the only rule is that there are no rules.

From the moment you come into a matrix, you lose your soul. And I care about my soul!

Now, if your thing is to be ecstatic at pictures of flowers, butterflies, waterfalls, rocks, then feel free to stay on your way because you will not find that here.

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